The New Kid

We’re already two weeks into the new school year. In some cases, there are districts that have been in school longer. Late busses, forgotten lunches or gym clothes. Unfinished homework, a failed assignment or test can sometimes crush the hardest souls. What is typically worse is the possible rejection by a student or group for whatever reason. Sometimes the reason is as simple as being new and unknown.

The experience varies from one student to the next as he or she tries to navigate the new school, the new year, and the hallways, cafeterias, locker rooms, and restrooms. It sometimes isn’t easy, is it? The “wrong” clothes, sometimes unclean, dirty. Not up to the “standards” of this or that group.

It hurts. Other than making sure kids aren’t outwardly cruel and inconsiderate, there isn’t much a principal like I was can do. If I saw or heard it, I would typically jump in, knowing that I risked making it worse for the new kid. Typically, I would rely on counselors and teachers to keep an eye and an ear out to prevent cruelty and unkindness. Most always I would check with a kid out of the spotlight and in a quiet moment.

In my book, Fan Mail, I introduced a character, Tony Vittoria, who was new to the school. Worse, I chose to have Tony move from one city and school in October, so he didn’t have the benefit of beginning school at the start so he could blend in with all the other kids. It was a tougher journey for him, especially since he carried secrets he wasn’t willing to share or open up about.

In one chapter, I had Tony experience “a moment” as he remembered some of what he had experienced.

Fan Mail by Joseph Lewis

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

The cafeteria, the locker room, and the restroom were the scariest places for new kids. Even with a thousand other kids floating through the hallways, new kids were an easy mark. It would begin with a bump, sometimes on purpose. It would graduate to a shove. The kid would be cornered and questioned. If the answers to the questions weren’t acceptable- and who in the hell knew what the acceptable answers were- slaps and punches would follow. Money demanded. Other items taken. And the new kid would be left alone to fend for himself, only to have the process repeated each day, until the novelty wore off. Sometimes, the novelty never wore off.

The funny thing about new kids. They knew other new kids went through the same thing. When in the same restroom or locker room, they didn’t stick around to watch, certainly not to intervene. They just hoped they could escape this one time, maybe guilty it was happening to someone else and not to them. A life cocktail that was difficult to drink.

Tony had seen and lived it.

The worst was the spring of eighth grade. The name calling. Taunts. The humiliation. Abandonment by friends, or rather, who he thought were friends. The utter aloneness. He managed to tough it out, though by the time the school year ended, Tony lost his smile. Maybe his reason to smile.

Quiet and reserved by nature, he went to school. He managed good grades. His teachers liked him. One in particular, Shelly Wilson, his art teacher, took time to talk to him, encourage him, and worry about him. The other teachers saw him as they did any other student. Just another kid.

All of this ran through Tony’s mind as he waited for Brian. Hoping Brian wouldn’t forget.

Tony leaned against the bank of lockers, wishing he would sink inside. If he just stood there and didn’t move, maybe no one would notice him.

Five minutes, inching towards six. At this rate, he wouldn’t have time to eat.

Hands sweaty, he rubbed his jeans, first one hand, then the other. His mouth, dry. His instinct was to find a quiet corner and eat lunch by himself.

—

Tony could very well be an exception, because for some kids, the entire year is like that. Forgotten and unseen. Alone, and oh, so lonely. Scared to death and sometimes not realizing what he or she is afraid of.

In Tony’s case, I had him meet Brian, one of seven adopted brothers, each dealing with and healing from past trauma of their own. Besides his own issues, Brian understood loneliness and being alone. He had experienced not being seen by those whom he thought had loved him.

Sometimes, all it takes is one person to save a kid. It can be a kid, a teacher, a counselor, or even a principal. It just takes one person to recognize what might hurt, and where a kid can fit it. In Brian’s case, he had six brothers and a strong group of friends he could lean on.

In some cases, the kid, not necessarily a new kid, has a falling out with a friend or a group of friends. In her song, Beautiful Things, Megan Moroney wrote about a kid staring at and crying in a bathroom mirror, not understanding why she was left out and not invited to a party. While she doesn’t give an outcome or share a reason why, she gives some wonderful and tender advice:

“Lies can break a fragile heart
But, honey, just take it from me
Just hold on, just breathe
The world is hard on beautiful things.”

Taylor Swift put it this way in her song Ours: So don’t you worry your pretty little mind. People throw rocks at things that shine.

As we begin this new school year, parents watch, listen to, and talk with your children. Please don’t be that parent who feels once their kid hits high school, there isn’t as much need for a gentle hand or a gentle word and know that it is imperative to talk to your kids. Teachers, please watch for the loner, the kid who appears to slink into your classroom for an hour and then slink back out, seemingly without any friendly contact. Sometimes, that is a sign the kid might be on his or her own with no friends.

No matter how many eye rolls you receive, or no matter how many times you ask how things are going, you always get the same response of “Fine,” please know things might not be fine at all. Your kid might be hurting. Don’t be afraid to reach out to a teacher or counselor, maybe even the principal. We are there to help, and what we don’t know is important to know. It can be tough out there. Something to think about …

Live Your Life, and Make A Difference!

To My Readers

If you are in the Fredericksburg, Virginia area on Saturday, Oct. 3, I will be taking part in the Fredericksburg Independent Book Festival at Riverfront Park from 10:00 AM to 4:00 PM. Authors of all genres will be there, and I will be selling and signing each of my ten books, including the above mentioned Fan Mail along with my other books. I hope you have an opportunity to stop by.

If you want to check out my books, go to my website at https://www.jrlewisauthor.com You’ll find them all. If you’d like to get a jump on it and purchase Fan Mail sooner, here is the link for it: Fan Mail by Joseph Lewis https://tinyurl.com/37xyxe3r If you purchase it ahead of time, bring it to the festival and I’ll be happy to sign it for you.

I’d love to hear your thoughts, so please use the comment section below. Your feedback, like your reviews, is important to me. As always, thank you for following along on my writing journey. Until next time …